Journal Entry #125

Sometimes being transparent can help others deal with the situations they are dealing with, because nine times out of ten our life situations are similar.

Delay is not denial, and denied doesn’t mean God hasn’t prepared something greater for you. Growing up I have been dreaming, wishing, hoping, and praying for the day when I would have the dream job and the dream husband. Now as that I have reached an age when I thought it would have happened already or would be happening it makes me think where did I go wrong or what have I been doing that is so wrong. Then I think about all the women who didn’t do the right things, who did everything the unconventional way and have kids and great jobs and husbands. Then I stand here confused, bewildered just really not understanding where my life is headed.

As many people who I have around me who love me, encourage, and motivate me I still sometimes feel like life sucks sometimes and I don’t have anything I desire in life. I am constantly praying for things to change and get better. People always ask who I am dating or where is my man but never have they tried to hook me up with anyone either, So I wonder is the concern genuine or not. Then other’s who always ask about my state of employment or if I finished that book or started that business. Sometimes it’s like, if I haven’t told you it hasn’t happened or if I haven’t told you it because I don’t desire for you to know.

I just know that life comes with ups and downs you take the good with the bad. At the end of the day, live your life for you not the expectations of others. Don’t date a man or woman because they look like a fit and will please your friends and family don’t forget about you. Don’t wait for the beginning of a new year to do something you always wanted let the idea spark cause you to move forward with your goals period.

 

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Kicking Up My Heels into 2018!!!

Ready for All that 2018 has for Me!!!

New years Eve Look …

Cream Hoodie Dress from Burlington coat factory. 

Burgondy Knee high boots Charlotte Russe 

#CurvyandCute #Fashionista #PrettyandPlussize #Lastpostof2017

I’m Baaack

im back

I needed that break, I needed to clear my mind take care of me refocus ,but I’m back like I never left. Thank you all for bearing with me, and I appreciate those of you who are still rocking with me.

As the year comes to an end I’m in a place where I’m ending certain things and preparing to start new things. This is not because it’s the end of the year it’s just because it’s much-needed in my life. Sometimes that’s what a little me time will do for you, give you clarity. Sometimes that break will give you the option to remove things that aren’t necessary and make room for what you desire.

I hope you all will continue this ride with me.

FYI that book is coming soon ūüôā

Merry Christmas , Happy Hanukkah, and Happy Kwanzaa

Until next time

 

 

Sometimes it’s necessary

Life can be full of ups and downs in and outs so many things. Learning how to balance them all is key. Although sometimes it can be overwhelming, our plates are sometimes too full or overflowing. We have to learn when and with whom to say no to, it can be difficult. Even the things we love the most are the things we need a break from. Even your body tells you when to slow down and take a break.

Sometimes it’s necessary to listen to and adhere to whats going on, taking a break from certain things will clear up time for you. We all need a little me time time away from things and people. It’s okay to tell people I need space, I need a sit this one out, I’m not going to hang out this time, etc. etc. Whatever it is you deserve that break and don’t be afraid of sitting this one out and maybe even the next one too. You’d be surprised at how much you need it and how much better you will feel.

                                                   Take A Break You Deserve It

Being Transparent (How does your parents relationship affect your dating life)?

One of my favorite television shows had me thinking last night. Being Mary Jane always has me thinking, but last night man I got a revelation. When Many Jane realized that her issues with men and her relationships stemmed from her mother,¬†man that¬†hit home. I always knew that our parents relationships had an affect on how we date and future relationships. It was something about last night that made me realized how much my choice in men is affected by my mother’s complaints about my dad. My mother named me A’Teirrah to be the opposite of her so I wouldn’t do the same things as her fyi my mother’s name is Harriet if you pay close attention to the spelling of our names you’ll get it.

My parents divorced when I was 3 and my mother always says she feels like she rushed into a relationship and marriage with my dad. Her mother made her feel as though if she didn’t marry my dad that she really wouldn’t have much of a choice of men. My mother always says to me don’t make the same mistake I did. It’s not that my mother didn’t love my dad they were married for 11 years. It was just some of my dads ways she couldn’t live with anymore which caused the divorce. My mother just wants me to be careful who I choose to make that lifetime commitment of marriage with. Another¬†thing about it all is that I try so hard to pick someone who doesn’t have the negative characteristics of my dad I forget to look for someone who encompasses the positive characteristics.

I noticed that every time I meet a guy I weed them out based on some similar characteristic to my dad, I realized that sometimes I don’t give guys a chance. Then I have those moments where I say hey give the next guy a chance and then it feels like I’m giving the wrong guy a chance and weeding out the ones that should have a chance. So then I wonder do I give every guy that takes interest or is potential a chance, this dating thing is a challenge.

Everyone has advice. I have asked my brother’s my friends, my family , I have read the books listen to the ministers prayed and fasted I’ve done it all. I’ve tried speed dating, online dating etc, I’ve even taking breaks to make sure I am ready to be courted and to be married. ¬†Am I going too stop trying different avenues probably not because you just never know how you will meet the one. One thing is for sure I will never pursue, I’m just not that kind of woman. I will make myself available, I will show interest but never will I pursue a man.

I will keep waiting because I refuse to settle for less than what I know God will provide.

MOTIVATORS!!!

I CONTINUE TO SURROUND MYSELF WITH THOSE WHO’S MOTIVATION, MOTIVATES ME TO STAY MOTIVATED AND MOVE FORWARD WITH MY GOALS!!!

You gave to make a decision to surround yourself with positive go getter people if that is what you desire to be. Ask questions don’t be ashamed or afraid of the unknown. I use to be afraid to ask questions but I got a revelation that if you don’t ask you won’t ever know. It can be a difficult task but it’s well worth it to sift your friends like wheat. I made it my business to only¬†surround myself with those who are like-minded or better minded (laughing but serious) than myself. That way they can show me I can ask questions I can grow and move forward. The people around me also motivate me, encourage, me tell me the truth especially when they know it will hurt my feeling but assist in my growth. Don’t be surprised if you are no longer on my list of people who I communicate with on a regular basis. I mean let’s be real you already know who you are because you don’t have my best interest at heart. It’s okay move on with your life know that I’m praying for you.

As for those of you who are my rocks, my cheerleaders, and I am yours lets keep moving forward, praying, encouraging, motivating, pushing and truth-telling so that we may all excel in life.

LEHGO!!!